In times of mind, Through experience, I lose myself.
I see, and think, and feel, And lose to myself.
I circle and dive, I resurface; To a confused sea.
I struggled against The currents within; And the steep mountain ahead.
I swim and climb; alone: Against the winds within.
In the blackness, Without light, I turn searching, For landfall, or the smallest foothold.
I am alone.
I reach out my hand, In one final grasp at survival.
...And suddenly, I feel The grip I have been seeking.
I am held afloat, A firm foot hold found,
It is love, And family, And friendship; It was there all the time.
The light of the beacon, Always shines; My blindness was from within.
The light now guides me; The light now fills me.
I now sail and trek forth, In light, in love; With hope.
“After 38 years of working in the same job I retired thinking all my stress and anxiety would go away. However, after so many years I found that my illness was more a part of me than actually ‘me’. Due to tragedy in my life those 38+ years crashed down on me like a tsunami, incapacitating me and requiring extensive treatment and recovery.
Part of that recovery has been getting back to writing my blog and poetry. This is the first poem I wrote in recovery and is basically unedited from the first draft. I know now that there is always hope.”